Next elective surgery... vasectomy

[My vasectomy experience has caused me and others some ongoing pain & sexual problems; let me explain:]

NOTE: I am editing this original April post to Matt, a post about MY vasectomy experience, today, in early September. Changes will be in brackets; I have not just deleted whole post or questionable parts without warning, 'cause one thing 'bout internet that freaks me is the way things can be changed, denied, as if never written... (I've had some guilt 'cause I wrote the post-vasectomy comments below after 7 1/2 years of ruminating and being mad. MOST is good, but a few things are misleading, some can reflect poorly and unfairly on wife, and including my name and town at the end was definitely T.M.I.--I love my wife. (In original post,I'd even taken a swipe at men, like my tolerant blog host Matt H., who's ALLOWED me this space, who have shared vasectomy experiences online...)

So, with bracketed changes, explainations, is that April post:

"It is quite remarkable that you are so high on listing, googling "bladeless vasectomy." I wish there had been a forum in my urologists office, so let me communicate with your readers, if you would! Anyway, without being asked to leave your site or blocked, my experience is not like those on all the you tube DR. videos of bladeless or open-ended or other "refinements" of vasectomy, and on this blog...[I actually had "scalpel" type procedure; & type of precedure itself not a problem; aftermath is...]

Cont.: "For any man, unlike myself, (I looked at none of the warnings about epididymitis, about being coerced by partner into permanent decisions, etc. 'cause my mind was made up) who's actually checking it out BEFORE setting the appointment, THIS PROCEDURE IS A HUGE DECISION both physically (I've had no day without pain, pressure, and reduced arrousability since my Y2K vasectomy 7 years ago) and mentally.

[Retraction]["who didn't look at coercion, epididymitis warnings: Not correct, and unfair to my wife: I DID skim it all, but my decision and a "vow" to wife were already made; and I wasn't "coerced" as it might imply, but sought to counter my wife's decision: to get herself ligated on the delivery table-- which I felt was harder procedure and unmanly of me, and which also had hurt my pride, as lig. procedure decision was made w/ doctor's, not my, input, while wife was under the normal stress of her last months of 3rd pregnancy at age 40]

Cont.: "Please DO note that all these great personal annecdotes aboout vasectomy deal with surface issues--method of cutting (slow "bladeless" tightening of blade on your scrotum, "jet" injection, just as painful as needle) and deal with "whew,-My dick didn't fall off!- I'm so gratified" Remember that these men have had just that--about 1-10 days with the procedure, and STILL in the "LAST MEAL" stage of death of their reprodictive ability & ability of epididymis to detect sexual need...

[Here I seem to have taken a swipe at my gracious blog host Matt Herring, whose blog I had just discovered, in my anger. I've read more of his stuff, and am happy, amazed he gave me a prominent forum to warn/talk to other men who may not have googled "vasectomy, complaints." Sorry, Matt.]

Cont.: "They (vasectomized men, posting experiences) have just received exiting "DOCTORS ORDERS" for their female mates-- to have intercourse

[ejaculate, actually]

(Cont. 30 times in the next month or some malarky, to get all those nasty sperm out of their plumbing, so they've just been able to TELL their mate to have sex repeatedly. For some men this "last meal" after the "execution" (slow poisoning, in my case) of some of their sexual pleasure and all of their reproductive ability is so exciting, because their mate has been less interested in sex than they, or even uses sex (or NO SEX) as a weapon....)

[I realize now that hopelessness over controlling male urge, similar to women "getting abortion, being like a trapped animal gnawing off its leg" analogy applies, as men ARE in a tough spot. I need less judgementalism, while still INFORMING, here...]

Cont.: "Just remember this: In my SMALL interviews of a dozen or so men after my vasectomy I found 3 with problems similar to mine--that admitted it, anyway--loss of arrousability, allergic issues (sperm autoimmunity?) and the pulling sensations, pain, in my case in left testicle, itching underside of scrotum from auto-immune reaction to trapped sperm in nearby epeididymis, etc., and changes in sex act ( I likened it to Black & White tv after having had color...) and arrousability (exciting--I can now turn away from my wife & say "not tonite" Fun, for a little "payback" but scary after she gives in and WANTS it, but now you don't... As one guy I talked to said, "I had sex and said, 'oh, shit!' its not the same, but what can I do now?" and another told me of a friend who's girl left 'cause he didn't want sex like he had (wanted it).

[Additon/Augmentation]--[Actually, more like 4 men said SOMETHING alarming 'bout their vasectomies. For instance, my next door neighbor, when I asked him, after long post-vasectomy "retraining" years STILL hadn't helped me decide WHEN I WAS HORNY like before vasectomy, when epididymis/vas system was intact, "Gary, how do you know when you're horny", Gary replied, "You've got to fake it!"]

Cont.: "(Vasectomy is)Great, if you are like the pre-med who tried to remove his adrenals at my college by operating in his dorm room, 'cause he felt OVERSEXED; or, if like my most vasectomy-positive friends, you were caught in adultery & want to do pennance--but not so great if like me (at age 41) and a couple of your kids are getting ready to leave, good times are going to start soon with wifey, but now you're suddenly sexually 55 years old and she's hornier than you though you were the stud just before this procedure, but YOU'RE (actually) only 42 years old...and you're driving holding your left testicle, 'cause the urologiest told 'ya that the only guy he'd ever had with pain was a hairdresser -(to play on your macho...)

[NOTE: My doctor DID admit to me he'd had a "HAIR DRESSER" patient who had pain: "He sits a lot"... But, NO man like me who cuts trees, cleans parking lots, does landscaping, was in wrestling, cross country, ran marathons, etc., wants to admit he has ANYTHING in common with a hairdressor, (though I'm remembering now that I had a perfectly STRAIGHT hairdresser down my street, ironically, with 2 kids...) ONE of the vasectomy patients I interviewed was a former Golden Gloves boxer, from my church, who said he sat in tub 2 days after his procedure and cried; he and his wife said they wish they had spoken to us BEFORE we did the deed, as they had lived to regret their vasectomy decision, made without God's input, in their fear & lack of faith} Googling "vasectomy complaints" one hears of men with worse pain (usually in one testicle) 5 years out, even having testicles partially or fully removed...This isn't spoken of by urologists...And, I don't think it is an accident that You Tube depictions of procedure always picture a patient with a "MEGA SCROTUM", as if implying that REAL MEN like / need to get and enjoy this procedure, so you should too...]

Cont.: "And think--Remember when you sat around and all the newest, coolest people in your small town or clique finally smoked pot, and they all wanted to SHARE their doobie with you? These brave new VASECTOMY BOYS all want to share with you, but none of them talk about post vasectomy syndrome, or the fact that the vas deferens isn't some whimpy little unfeeling duct from a gland, but a well-enervated, highly sensitive & muscular tube that is AN IMPORTANT PART OF THE SEX ACT, as is the sensitive sperm-holding part of the testicle, the epididymis, which becomes overfilled and essentially "blows out" in most [some](vasectomized)men, and no longer has its role as "pressure guage" in determining sexual need, being either always painfully OVER filled (my case) after doctor cauterizeses vas shut (definition of epididymitis in Tabor's Medical Dictionary IS BLOCKAGE of VAS!!!!)[so true. check it.]

[actually, overfilling, not minute structures of epididymis blowing out lead to constant pain, blowout is a complication making REVERSALS harder, I read after my vasectomy; I did find it upsetting to learn about epid. blowouts, because I had hoped to reverse this thing once my wife was back to normal, and cost goes WAY up, prognosis down, with blowout. --until I learned the worst, that reversals cost $10K, are not covered by ins., & I felt recovery time would have torpedoed my new promotion that had me with incredible new responsibility level... I DO fault doctors, both urologists & gynecologists, for offering woment & men PERMANENT solutions to TEMPORARY situations at time of emotional upheaval, much as euthanasia enthusuiasts do, however.]

Cont.: or, (referring to purpose of original INTACT vas and epididymis) epididymis NEVER filled in case of "open ended" vasectomy, therefore not serving purpose of determining sexual need, while in both cases, sex becomes less frequent for the man, prostate instead becomes over-filled and painful, and [epididymis] even more so in the days AFTER your wife becomes outgoing and does all you ever wished she had.

In short this operation is at best a sort of "gift of the magi" where you take away some of the very satisfaction you and your wife hoped to have, while trying to manufacture a sexual renaissance that a few more years of patience would give you, NATURALLY. And consider this: as a misguided guy at my church told me, vasectomy may show LOVE to your wife, but how about using 3 condoms at once until she gets over her fears, reaches menapause, or you get that unexpected promotion (like I did just AFTER my vasectomy) that would make another kid a possibility and a blessing? (I got a $750 / week contract in addition to my other work that grew to 1,200 / week, but lost it after 3 1/2 years: It involved lotsa physical work but also lotsa driving, and I was driving with my left hand holding my still-painful left NUT --I credit vasectomy for LOSING me that contract!...

[I told people that my ongoing pain level from vasectomy, slight urinary incontinence, itching, etc. that started in days after procedure was "not enough to ruin my day"--Men are WIRED to salute with their left arm if right one is blown off.--a reason this procedure continues, I think... But after a grueling night of driving stop-to-stop, holding my ball, (right ball also intermittently hurt--I think your balls alternate in sperm production just as one nostril fills at night, then the oter... This all wore me down, along with psychological fact that I had done this to MYSELF, but didn't have time or $ to fix it: I don't want to play victim card, though going back to my urologist was as successful as a woman going back to an abortionist and complaining--He blew me off and said, "come back with scientific proof or a lawer"]

Cont.: "Wait on God and do not sell that pocket watch--your sexual enjoyment is actually important to your wife even if she doesn't realize it yet and you will both be sorry to see it diminished before its time... God has me getting up a programmer who has CP and is raising a boy he adopted, so I'm getting to experience raising a boy (wife called it quits after 3 girls, all of them blessings!!!) but why wait 7 yars & go thru the pain when you can TALK to your wife now, show some backbone, and REFUSE that doobie? And don't let her get a ligation--Increased PMS, Bleeding, abdominal pressure, due to cutoff of blood supply to ovaries caused by tying off the fallopian tubes.

God wired us carefully 'cause He MEANT it when he said "be fruitful and multiply" and in Ps 127 that we are BLESSED with children, and in proverbs when he said a nation becomes STRONG (not weak) with increased population....

Signed: [my name friends know me by; a little concern for my wife's privacy would have been better],

Cont.:
[our home town][I'm editing out my home town 'cause I just got so concerned, a couple hours ago, thiinking about this post being up for 4 months and that that some acquaintance at church or elsewhere might have read it, that I was unable to perform in bed just now out of fear & guilt, not above physical problems! I am removing this unnecessary bit of "where we live" authentic-ness. Some ladies at church did just treat my wife disrespectfully today--Who knows, unlikely, but they could've been gossipping 'bout this post for all I know...That will take the lead out of your pencil...]

[Thanks, if you could read such a long post,
Signed,
Newly Anonymous]

The procedure was performed in his office. I went in and laid down on a generic examination table with my pants off of course. I was flat on my back with my legs together. He prepped the area with the brown betadine antiseptic and then gave me anesthesia via the jet injection gun. It felt and sounded like a small rubberband snapping on my skin. a little startling but not really uncomfortable. He did the injection three times on each side. Then he snipped and cauterized the vas deferens. There was one guy sitting in the waiting room who was going next. his facial response was priceless. I quickly told him that I was just joking and that it was completely painless. I popped a couple of Tylenol and that seems to be working pretty well. I looked at the wound and there was a little swelling right around the puncture hole not much else though. Just behind the left testicle feels swollen and is painful to touch. Running and exercise is no problem and there is no pain after ejaculation.That will take the lead out of your pencil. This is the second time I was scheduled for the procedure.thanks male enhancement